I am a huge proponent of Carol Dwek’s work around growth mindset and the importance of leaning into the belief that we can develop ourselves (even in areas that feel challenging) with time, effort and support. I reference holding a growth mindset versus a fixed mindset quite regularly in my work with clients.
When someone is navigating a life or career transition or starting something new, it seems like we always land on the need to embrace a growth mindset. If you want to learn about what growth mindset is, and is not, you can learn more in an article written by Dr. Dwek here.
Given my love for thinking this way, you can only imagine my surprise when the words “I’m really not interested in having a growth mindset” popped out of my mouth.
Yikes, I said it. As if that wasn’t surprising enough, I said it to a colleague who is also familiar with, and knows the value of, a growth mindset. Do I double down on this statement that unexpectedly emerged from my lips or do I back away and say, “I didn’t really mean that…what I meant is…” The answer is, I doubled down.
What I realized in that moment is that we don’t always need, or necessarily want, a growth mindset in all areas of work and life. And that’s ok. In my case, it was something that I really wasn’t interested in learning or getting good at. It was something that I could ask someone for assistance with or delegate. Your reasons may be different.
What’s important is that you give yourself permission to not always jump on the growth mindset train.
Below is a checklist for when you may want to embrace a growth mindset and another one for when it’s fine to say “No thanks, I’m good.”
When to jump on the growth mindset train
- You are new at a job and feeling frustrated by your lack of knowledge
- You are a beginner and have been wanting to develop proficiency in something
- You are really interested in learning, yet it’s not coming easily to you
- You would rather not fail, so are considering not trying
- You are concerned about your lack of knowledge in comparison to your peers
For all of the above, remind yourself that you are still learning. It is a journey, and with dedication, focus, and patience you will grow your skill. It’s a perfect time to remember that Rome wasn’t built in a day. It may also be helpful to reflect on a time when you felt overwhelmed previously in your life, and how you have gained competence and confidence over time by embracing a growth mindset.
Asking for support is invaluable when you choose the growth mindset path. Learning from others feels good to the giver and receiver of knowledge. Remember, we have all been beginners before we became proficient in everything that we do well.
When to step off the growth mindset train
- You are pushing yourself to learn something that holds no interest and is unneeded in your life/work
- Growth in this area is draining you and taking away from investing in something that pumps you up
- Your time and energy feels better spent on something of greater interest
- Your self-esteem and confidence is taking a hit because you are pushing yourself to grow in an area that is not aligned with your strengths, values, or interests
- You know you “can” yet the cost of pursuing this will be far greater than the benefit
If you answered yes to any of the above, it might be time for you to get off the train. When you feel the downside to staying on far outweighs the upside to getting off, your decision becomes obvious. It’s time to cut your losses and remember that we don’t need to be good at everything!
In summary, knowing when to stay on the growth mindset train and when to get off (or not hop on in the first place) will allow you more time to invest energy into the areas that feel worth growing. Giving yourself permission to accept the invitation to hold a growth mindset or reject the invitation is quite empowering. Give it a try!
